the blog

If you read anything this year, let it be the blog post, The Tail End by: Tim Urban. (I’ll include the link at the bottom.) If afterwards you don’t feel sentimental (or all-out sob hysterically -- like I have) ... congratulations, because it's a heavy one.  Furthermore, the most remarkable thing I have watched in the name of entertainment or education is the TED talk, Do Schools Kill Creativity by: Sir Ken Robinson (link also at bottom). I watch it each year since I discovered it. Because of my own chosen career path, I have many friends who work in the performing arts and if any of you are reading this post (which I have shared on Facebook and Instagram)… please know that the assessments supported in both of these works will make your heart sing and your optimism float! They are both so valuable and confirming in a world that moves faster than ever before. READ THE BLOG, WATCH THE LINK, you’ll thank me later. “ I can’t tell you how wonderful it was, we walked in...

Disclaimer: I didn't vote for President Trump, but he is the President and a huge part of me wants desperately for him to succeed... not to break a mold or to shove it to corrupt politics but because if he does, then the people and nation will be succeeding to a certain degree too.  Dear Mr. President  Elect , You have been elected, the majority has spoken … and now you have asked us to rally behind you, regardless of where our individual votes were cast; I genuinely agree that it’s our part of the deal, in a free democratic election, we should rally behind the victor. So Mr. Trump, I’m rallying; but please don’t forget your part of the deal. You promised us we’d never be forgotten again and that you’d lead each and every one of us. You may not personally value or place import on the things I do, but your end of the bargain revolves around listening to our voices. To start, this is what (our voices) are saying: 1.      RESPECT is RE...

Don’t be fooled, you can never know what having your own wedding day would be like until it’s happening to you. I had attended quite a few weddings in my lifetime, and I let myself believe I didn’t need one. I told myself that chair coverings and table cloth colors should never be something to focus my energy on. I let myself be fine with not spending so much money on one day, and I allowed myself think that a wedding was a vain, tradition I could live without—I was wrong, I was - oh so very wrong. I never was the little girl who dreamt of her wedding day, I used to dream of pink skies, walking across laser beams and about what clouds tasted like. My mind was a wonderland of curiosity and I could lose myself there for hours. It never occurred to me to imagine something common, I didn't think to obsess about something that seemed rather expected of us. I am a hopeless romantic, but I’m unconventional to t...

I was feeling a bit emotional and frantic the days and minutes leading up to an event we will, from here on out, call #cheesgate. When one has too much time to think, unfortunately that thinking can -- and often does -- go sour. And after these ideas turn to worry; they birth a variety of other negatives which wouldn’t have been possible if not for the superfluous thinking to begin with. Sometimes you hear people talking about planting those good mental seeds; think positive – they say cheerfully…. and look on the bright side. Time after time, articles, blogs, papers, quotes, and books proclaim that being positive is the way forward. I’ve read that being positive will help you have mostly positive experiences. This is probably true and we all know it. Getting out of bed to whine about the cold floor or the bad dream, surely becomes the stubbed toe and burnt toast, traffic, spill, trip, arrrggghhhhh! Even though I believe this idea and for the most part try to live by it, som...

This is a do-over moment. I think…. I started a blog in 2014, initially just to show myself I could do it, to show myself that I could make time for it or write powerful things, and maybe a little bit to prove I wasn’t afraid to share my ideas with complete strangers. Hi! For about two minutes, I felt bold and brave and checked off a resolution. Bond--James Bond. But as it turns out, I made all the classic mistakes. I didn’t introduce myself, I didn’t grow an audience, I didn’t   specialize ...so what?!   I gravitate towards passion and enthusiasm, I follow my own set of specific blogs.... but I just wish there was also space for talking and typing and pondering without diversifying without choosing a very specific niche.   I value authenticity and I don’t want to hide behind an internet image  that can only protects me from reality and pain. I  actually want to expose myself and talk about my realities and pain. I want to s...

FORWARD  I think my story really begins the night I watched my mom skating on a seven-foot by eight- foot homemade ice pond in our backyard. The space was illuminated just enough by a small floodlight and I could see her from my bedroom window; she looked so pretty.   It was one of those misty nights so it seemed like the air was thick and maybe even visible in that single beam of the light shining in her direction. I was seven years old then. Little did I know that my first experience with ice skating would spark a 12-year drive towards an Olympic dream. Over the next decade, I spent hundreds of hours perfecting technique, and my parents spent hundreds and thousands of dollars on skates, competitions, ice time, and coaching fees. Nine years after my first day on the ice, I was an international and national medalist, and my desire to reach higher filled me. In 2000, my climb to the top was halted. I learned hundreds of intricate things during my push to find my ultimate...

To fully understand this part of the story you must first read the prequel PREQUEL The house of cards began to fall. As I reaffirmed my version of events, I was more sure than ever that I believe in love. I believe in the idea evolving in love with ever-changing conditions. Impermanence making all life possible, all love possible.  But I also believe in other people, they are the true silver lining of living a human life; people - delicate, unique, people.  And above all, I believe in commitment--define it for yourself, value it as you wish but don't be a hypocrite. I was being a hypocrite.  I decided that, I will bolt myself to those rare unique people I find and I will be right there for 300 years. I will! My version of commitment is   longer, thicker and more gritty than a mouthful of dirt.  I believe in the scariest of desires and all versions of emotional security,...